Today has been an emotional day again. Yesterday afternoon was too. I’ve got so much to post today. Many emotions…I don’t even know why they’re all enveloping me without mercy. This blogging thing takes a good while out of your day; especially when you’re a newb like me. Ha-ha. I’m not going to give it any more thought as to which story I’ll share first. I’m just going to start with the most fresh one…my parents.
It all started since yesterday afternoon, around 3pm. I was on my way to pick up my middle son when I began switching radio stations, trying to find something GOOD. I wasn’t sure what I was in the mood for. I just wanted something to grab me for a moment and take me on a road somewhere; away, away from my reality. Boy, did I find the right song.
I have been living in San Diego for hundreds of years; though I was born in Houston, my heart has always rested in Cali. For all the years I’ve been alive, here or there, I had never heard this song/singer on the radio. The only place I heard this was at home, with my parents. They hadn’t played him in years. Since they came to live in the US, they brought over hundreds of cassette tapes. Remember those? Yea, those. They don’t play them anymore; sadly.
So, here I am. Traffic light is near and this song come up. I leave it there since I know this song. This song is ancient! I loved this song when I was a little girl but had forgotten all about it. The song commences and it is passionate. It brings memories. I’m taken way back in time. A time when there where no cell phones and the color of the days where off tone. The old pictures come to mind. Those goofy checkered shorts my brother had—man they were short. My father’s young face, so proud to be in San Diego. My young mother, sweating her face off, trying to speak English. Me, a nervous wreck just from watching them struggle with the language. It must have been 1978 or so. I was tiny so the memory comes foggy, as if I could just reach the dinner table.
My parents were much more relaxed once they were back in our apartment, ofcourse. That’s when they played their cassettes. The noise was horrible; none of this HD stuff we have today. I could hear the crisp skips from the record player it originally played. My mom would let loose and sing from the top of her lungs. I thought she sang remarkably well and truly believed she could have been a star if she would have wanted to. Song after song, she’d sing them all.
They were mostly romantic songs. Incredible songs and music. I loved how passionate they were. Many of the artists were Argentinian or from Spain but I was five or six, they sang in a language I knew and therefor, they were Mexican to me. Now I realize they weren’t. lol. (Well, not now-now…you know what I mean. lol)
The tears ran down my cheeks as the foggy memories played in my mind. These memories when my parents were young. They came to a country without knowing what the HELL! Really! Who does that?? They were scared, now I know, but I still think they had massive balls of steel to leave everything they ever knew behind but a pillowcase full of cassette tapes. Cassettes which had records of memories that would tell their story. Stories about where they came from, who they were and why. Music filling the rooms with dreams and ambitions, passions and desires.
This one melody took me back. I cried and cried like a lost kid who’s been looking for their parents and has found them. Only now they are old and tired—and my mom doesn’t sing that loud anymore.
Once I got home, I looked this song up in Youtube and listened to it over and over. This morning again, but this time more songs came to mind and I’ve been listening to them all. With tears running down my face, I wonder how I’ll feel when my parents are gone and these songs come up? Will they come on ever again? Will I cry like a baby remembering them?
I told myself I’m going to learn these lyrics and play them loudly infront of my children. I’ll sing from the top of my lungs and pass these on to my kids.